Jesus Christ Constipated

Lyrics by Tim Corn
Lyrics Copyright (C) 2009, Cough-Cough Media Group

The Musical achievement of humanity: Jesus Christ Constipated.

Powerful songs of a man's need for salvation.


What's that Noise?
What's that noise, tell me that ain't happenin'!
What's that smell, tell me that ain't happenin'!
What's that noise, tell me that ain't happenin'!
What's that smell, tell me that ain't happenin'!
Will you keep it down?
I am trying to take a shit here!

Everything's Alright
Try not to push too hard,
don't blow out your anus
<indistinct>
You know that everything's all right,
yes, it will be fine.
If you strain you'll get hemorrhoids.
Close your eyes, close your eyes,
just relax and loosen your bowels.


I Don't Know How To Help Him
I Don't Know How To Help Him.
I've tried all the herbal remedies.
He's still backed up like rush hour.

Trial before Pilate
One! (Jesus pushes and grunts)
Two! (Jesus pushes and grunts)
Three! (Jesus pushes and grunts)
Four! (Jesus pushes and grunts)

This Jesus must Pass
Because, because, because he ate cheese,
If anything passes it'll feel like a tree!
Because, because, because he ate,
'cause he ate, 'cause he ate...cheese.