Jesus Christ Constipated

Lyrics by Tim Corn
Lyrics Copyright (C) 2009, Cough-Cough Media Group

The Musical achievement of humanity: Jesus Christ Constipated.

Powerful songs of a man's need for salvation.


What's that Noise?
What's that noise, tell me that ain't happenin'!
What's that smell, tell me that ain't happenin'!
What's that noise, tell me that ain't happenin'!
What's that smell, tell me that ain't happenin'!
Will you keep it down?
I am trying to take a shit here!

Everything's Alright
Try not to push too hard,
don't blow out your anus
<indistinct>
You know that everything's all right,
yes, it will be fine.
If you strain you'll get hemorrhoids.
Close your eyes, close your eyes,
just relax and loosen your bowels.


I Don't Know How To Help Him
I Don't Know How To Help Him.
I've tried all the herbal remedies.
He's still backed up like rush hour.

Trial before Pilate
One! (Jesus pushes and grunts)
Two! (Jesus pushes and grunts)
Three! (Jesus pushes and grunts)
Four! (Jesus pushes and grunts)

This Jesus must Pass
Because, because, because he ate cheese,
If anything passes it'll feel like a tree!
Because, because, because he ate,
'cause he ate, 'cause he ate...cheese.

Time-Life Music presents "Atheist Country"

This 666 song collection features classic and modern artists.

You'll hear Tiger by the Tail by Buck Owen,

I've - got - a - tiger by the tail, and it's a-twitchin'. //
I know that fucker's gonna spin around and gore me. //
And as my soul departs by badly, ripped-up body, //
I'm fucked, 'cause there ain't no Gawd. //
Yes, I'm fucked, 'cause there ain't no Gaw-d!

Travellin' Jesus by Geff Mack,

I've lied everywhere, man, //
I've lied everywhere. //
I tell 'em hokum-pokum //
And they fall for it, I swear.


and Ring of Fire by Jonny Cash

I fell in-to a burning ring of fire. //
It was normal fire 'cause //
there ain't no power high'r //
And it burned, burned, burned, //
like normal fire, like normal fire.


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